Funnily enough, after I mentioned Joshua Radin getting us 'in the mood' in my last post, he told the story last night about one of his songs called "You Got What I Need". Apparently friends of his were trying to conceive without much success. They told him they had fallen in love listening to his music and asked him to write them a song to help them to conceive. This was the song:
When he played "Brand New Day" the tears just started running down my cheeks. As I posted before, I first listened to this song after my 3rd miscarriage, when I was trying to pick myself up off the floor. The 3rd miscarriage, really left me bereft. I don't think I ever felt the need to apply that word to myself before. I remember sitting there thinking "I don't know where to put all this sadness"...like it was a flood that I was trying in vain to divert or contain. The thing is that the world does still go on and, even in the midsts of your despair (assuming you're not clinically depressed and can get out of bed), you know you have to find a way to pick yourself up and engage with it. I knew that at the time, which is why the song helped me. It's like the line in the Shawshank Redemption:
"Get busy livin' or get busy dying."
Oh, and the friends did have a baby...Unfortunately for us, by the time we got home it was almost midnight - very late for a "school" night, so there was no chance of BDing. But hey, there's always tonight...