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27 March 2011

The girl who cried "baby"

My Dad told me something interesting yesterday.  He said that next time I get pregnant he doesn't want to know until after 12 weeks.  I'm not sure what to make of this.  Sure, I know it's upsetting for them to be told they have a grandchild on the way and then to be 'untold' a few weeks later.  I'm sure this is even harder for them when it happens again and again, as it has in our case.  Hell, I'd like to get past 12 weeks before finding out I'm pregnant, but I'm pretty sure that's not realistic, especially if I have to use the pessaries again.  I mean ignorance may be bliss, but it's rather difficult to maintain when you're sticking a little white bullet up your "hoo-ha" every night and then lying still for 30 minutes!

Even the first time I got a BFP I was very selective about who I shared the news with.  But once you've had a miscarriage, particularly if you're an anxious person like I am, the wait until that supposedly magical 12 week mark is absolute torture.  Trying to get on with ordinary day to day life like work, grocery shopping and paying bills in between checking your underpants for blood every 15 minutes and over-analysing every single little twinge or cramp is stressful, and time seems to slow to a crawl.  It helps to have a few select people who are in on the secret to offer support.  I'm not sure my Dad has considered it from this perspective and I'm sure he means well, but I do wonder how this would work in practical terms.  Because I'm pretty sure my Mum doesn't feel the same way, and it is hard to imagine her keeping a secret like that from Dad.  Anyway I guess I'll have to ask her myself.  Hopefully the next time I have news for them it won't just be a drill.

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